Time

Sometimes I cannot believe it's already been four months since her birth. She's not a new-born anymore.  

Sometimes I sit and wonder how it could have been only four months in the hospital. It feels like a lifetime.

Time is so relative...

She was taken away the moment she grasped her first breath. I saw her black hair. I heard her cry. And that was it. I touched her three days later.

Our story is one in a hundred. Babies are coming to the ward and leaving it on a daily basis. It is impossible not be affected by their destinies and their parents' pain. We all seem to be living in a spiral of our children's ups and downs. Following their monitors with the attention no reality TV can catch.

I am aware that many on the other side of the hospital walls do not and cannot truly understand any of this, but it is of a great comfort knowing none of us inside is in this alone.

Our fight is not yet done. Her heart keeps failing. We are waiting for the second open heart surgery. Hoping it will make her better. Hoping it will make her heart more stable. Hoping she will win this battle against nature.