Home sweet home

Once we came home, almost seven months after Emanuela's birth, we started the "real work". While saving her life was always a top priority in the hospital, it was now time to put some quality into it. To make a life worth saving and living.

I was often told that her state will change rapidly for the better and that she will improve at a quicker pace once we get home. While this information just increased my frustration during her hospitalization, once at home, it proved to be true.

We started intensive learning on how to eat: open the mouth, suck, swallow. That was my top priority and most of the day was dedicated to that. With one of her doctor's support, we found a great specialist in Chinese medicine and baby acupuncture so we also added that to the pile of efforts to help and support her body. We did physiotherapy exercises to train her hands and upper body. Her muscles were underdeveloped as she spent her entire life so far laying down. I massaged her shoulders to lower and relax them. She loved turning from her back to her belly and around which we did to boost her gross motoric skills. We also did itsy bitsy yoga just for the fun of it. We played and cuddled and I talked to her and sang.

This "normal" life hit me by surprise. While she thrived, my thoughts and feelings about the past seven months started slowly to come together. And one thing was clear to me - I have to put a meaning to everything we went through and all that was ahead of us.